Ntokozo Xaba (23) is just another name, very similar to Uyinene Mrwetyana.
Just another woman whose life has been cut short, supposedly at the hands of her partner. Her story is, sadly, an all-too-common story for a South African demographic, black women, who in addition to fearing for their lives in the face of increasingly violent men, bear the brunt of the country’s socioeconomic decline: they are the most unemployed. and the poorest in the country. That is not to say that these murders are reserved for this segment of the population. We are approaching Valentine’s Day and the tenth anniversary of the murder of Reeva Steenkamp.
This week, Xaba’s ex-boyfriend was charged with frustrating the ends of justice and murder after he allegedly stabbed her to death. If she has forgotten the name Uyinene, she was a University of Cape Town student who was raped and murdered in the Cape Town suburb of Claremont almost four years ago.
Their names will soon begin to fade in our minds as the body count continues to grow, to the tune of about seven women a day in this country. That’s over 2,500 bereaved mothers.
These are daughters and grandmothers who find themselves at the bottom of their partner’s boots, or strangers who, due to patriarchal indoctrination, believe they own them.
Fear is the norm for women living in our big cities, towns and villages. But if sleeping with a would-be enemy wasn’t bad enough, in Johannesburg, where we live nearly 12-hour charging days, the streets are providing more layers of darkness for strangers to hide in.
For a single woman who lives and works in these dark and crowded streets, her body is a commodity and freedom is a phenomenon she can only wish to know. If you’re not living at the mercy of a potential killer like Karabo Mokoena did, you’re dodging calls from strangers and asking a friend to come with you to the mall because you’re afraid of being kidnapped.
Mokoena’s ex-boyfriend was convicted of her murder in 2018 after her burned remains were found buried in a shallow grave in an open field. That is the value of a woman’s life in this country. Approximately 9,516 rapes were reported to the police between April and June 2022, and of that number only 286 convictions were handed down. She’s not a very promising figure for women brave enough to speak up.
Falling in love is a death sentence and romance is stabbed to death, dismembered and put in a suitcase left on the street. That was the reality of Nosicelo Mtebeni. His ex-boyfriend Alutha Pasile confessed to his murder in 2021 and was sentenced to 25 years in prison. She was only 23 years old.
Consider yourself lucky as a woman if you make it home safely today but can’t hold your breath. Tomorrow is another day.
